Living in the south

I call myself a full blooded Yankee wilfully transplanted in the south. I have always been intrigued with the American southern culture. Originally being from Northern Virginia, which is still south of the Mason Dixon line, I am considered a Yankee here in North Carolina.
I do love the south. There is a lot to say about southern hospitality. There have been many locals that have made us feel completely welcome. The one thing that does not go over very well is when I am asked what church I belong to. I tell them I was raised Catholic but do not practice. It doesn't go over very well partly because of being raised Catholic and mostly because I do not belong to a church. To truly fit in I should belong to a church...oh well. I have my own views on religion. I have my values, I believe in the 10 commandments yet I don't feel that I need to belong to a church to be whole. I will always be "different" when it comes to religion.
The reason I am bringing this up is that Hubby and I are in a competition. We have been noticing a lot of signs in front of Churches and bumper stickers that we find absolutley hysterical. I certainly do not want to offend anyone but I decided to post these on my blogger page so that I had one place to write these "words of wisdom". At the end of each month Hubby and I are going to vote on which one is the most clever. If you read please help us vote! The title will be "Words of Wisdom".
Enjoy.